Honour Yourself

People talk about Self Love but what does it mean? Some people believe loving yourself means forgiving yourself for acting in ways that aren’t congruent with your heart. For others it means listening to your feelings and prioritising your needs. Each soul takes it’s spin on Self Love according to what it needs to learn.

For me, it was not obvious. Sounds strange maybe?

It took me a few years to figure out why the notion of self love did not resonate with me because I’d always been selfish in terms of doing what I wanted and forgiveness wasn’t a theme in my life.

If anything, I was helping others realise how much love they needed to give to themselves.

In fact I was so brilliant at helping friends and family because I gave them ‘unconditional help’.

But I was wrong to do this because I tolerated negative behaviour from people who could not see beyond their victim consciousness or self righteousness.

I listened to people for thousands of hours because they needed to know they were heard and they needed love but over time it weighed me down and I was wearing myself thin.

A lot of the time, the people I strived to help were not moving forward in their lives and they would come back with the same problems. These people needed emotional attention and healing but they had too much pride to question themselves.

But I strived to help them even more, until one day during a theta healing session I realised this was a form of self abuse.

You see, I used to believe that If you are a good person, good things come back to you. I used to think that eventually people change with enough support.

But this is not necessarily true.

You cannot change other people. Change must happen inside you.

The other day, I heard a coach talking about honouring yourself and this resonated with me.

After all these years of trying to figure out what self love meant for me - I found it.

Honouring my self is my act of self care.

Today, I will honour my self before committing to helping others and if the weight of this is too much I will stop.

You have to find your version of what loving yourself means to you.

And when you do, the notion of Self love has a meaning that will change your life forever.